revenge of the adj. n.

Looks like I'm sticking to medicine

2011-05-24T12:25:00.000-06:00

Just received this email. I guess my 'Plan A' fell through.

Dear Andrew

Thank you very much for your interest and application for the first

Virgin Galactic Pilot-Astronaut positions.

Despite the very demanding qualifications, we had over 500

applications, the vast majority from very well qualified and experienced

test pilots. As you can imagine, filtering down such a large pool of

talent and having to leave out many highly respected test pilots, as

well as a few flown astronauts, was an extremely difficult task.

We were able to invite just eight of this group forward to the next

stage of the process and I regret to inform you that we were unable to

include you. We appreciate that this may be a major disappointment but

it is no exaggeration to say that we received a great deal of interest

from some of the world’s very best and highest qualified pilots.

Thank you for your application and interest in Virgin Galactic and we

wish you the very best in your future career.

With regards,

Virgin Galactic Careers

Foreign Accent Syndrome

2011-05-06T10:46:00.000-06:00

This clip should speak for itself. A very rare condition:

Happy Day

2011-04-13T16:27:00.000-06:00

Today I finished the last practical exam for the hands-on course in Osteopathic Manipulative Medicine. It was hours of recording findings of physical dysfunction on a partner followed by treatment (all under time and technique constraints). I only mention this because, after two long years of sitting in OMM labs for 3 hours a week, I am more than ready to move on. Funny enough, after all the time I spent resenting the fact that we had to spend so much time doing OMM, I now feel much more sympathetic towards it. Some of that goodwill towards OMM may just be due to the fact that I am elated at being done. Now I have so much more free time to... you guessed it: Study!

Maple Syrup Urine Disease

2011-03-31T16:45:00.000-06:00

So I was studying just now and realized that some of the things I've learned in school are actually really fascinating. Sometimes I forget that I didn't know any of it before coming here. With that in mind, I'm going to combine my studying with my blogging just this once. If you like it, don't praise this post too much or I'll just make this a study blog.

Today's Topic: Maple Syrup Urine Disease
Can you imagine having a baby, and maybe a week after coming home from the hospital you start noticing that every time you change the diaper, you smell maple syrup. This is a real disease that makes untreated babies' urine smell like maple syrup.
What's going on? Some amino acids (protein building blocks) have branched carbon chains instead of straight carbon chains. If you don't have the enzyme 'branched-chain alpha-ketoacid dehydrogenase', your body can't break these branched chains down. They start to accumulate in your body until they start spilling out into your urine. The branched chain amino acids smell like maple syrup.

If this happens, it is important to take baby to the doctor and get evaluated. A baby diagnosed with MSUD needs to spend the rest of their life avoiding foods with branched chain amino acids, allowing them to live a long fulfilling life. Otherwise the buildup causes severe neurologic impairment and death which is very sad.

There you have it. One of the amazing diseases I only learned existed in the last couple years.

Hair

2010-09-02T23:11:00.005-06:00

Today I found a little time to get a much-needed haircut. The problem I've faced recently is this: Do I go back to the cheap and familiar hair place where half of my haircuts have been mediocre or bad? Or branch out to a (probably) more expensive salon where I will be out of my comfort zone and have no assurance of satisfaction? After going back and forth on this for the last few haircuts and never getting the courage to choose another shop, I called 'A Shear Encounter II' and set up an appointment this morning during a cancelled class.

After walking in and being introduced to my new stylist, my mind was put to ease as she acknowledged the difficulties my hair presents in cutting. We talked for a while about what would work what wouldn't, and why, and then she took me to the sinks at the back to get my shampooing on. Instead of going back to my chair for the remainder of the cut, she asked me to follow her towards a side room. I followed, dumbly.

She asked me to sit for a moment in what looked like a feminine dentist chair. I acquiesced, waiting for her to explain what was about to happen. Pulling out a tiny paintbrush she declared, "I'm going to wax your eyebrows. Don't worry, you'll still look like a man."

I am accustomed to my bushy, overgrown eyebrows. People have occasionally suggested I tweeze or wax my eyebrows, but I have never relented because I haven't trusted what the result would be. I figured, "If not now, when?" So, after confirming that she wasn't charging me extra to tame my brow, I assented.

She leapt (figuratively) to work...

"That wasn't so bad was it?" It actually wasn't terrible. She was done in less than a minute.

The cut went smoothly, and I left, happy to have a relatively inexpensive haircut that I was fully pleased with (perhaps the first time since moving here I have really felt satisfied). As I drove back to campus, I looked in the rearview mirror and saw the red skin on my forehead beaming brazenly for all to see.

[Sorry, No Photo Available]

This only made it slightly embarrassing to explain when I got to my lab a few minutes later. "So I was looking for a new place to get my hair cut and next thing I know..."

Back in school...

2010-08-11T14:37:00.001-06:00

I am back in the library for the beginning of my second year. I'm going to start studying as soon as I finish this bag of chips...

The "Saturday Morning Special"

2010-06-14T08:48:00.002-06:00

I imagined an innovation of flavor a couple weeks ago, but waited until yesterday afternoon before actually creating it. Yesterday worked well for its debut, as Janelle was out of town, which meant that I didn't need to explain myself to her as I prepared this gastronomical exploration.

(Janelle, I promise I'll make you one as soon as you get home. xo)

Step 1: Caramel Coyote Ice Cream

Step 2: Root Beer Dessert Topper

Step 3: Chocolate Syrup

Step 4: Honey Nut Cheerios (For a nutritious appearance)

Step 5: Milk

Step 6: Enjoy!

Hot Doug's Sausage Superstore

2010-06-06T15:31:00.010-06:00

Yesterday Janelle and I went to a local restaurant called Hot Doug’s Sausage Superstore, a hot dog establishment. We heard we had to try it, but as we were walking up we were dismayed to see this line. Since we are on summer break and no longer have time restrictions we opted to stick it out.

We thought the half-block line would move fast enough, but it still took an hour and a half before we were able to place our orders. Before we got to the end of the line we saw the sign saying the place was cash only. Since we had only $15, we figured we would have to stick to the regular menu ($1.75-$3.00 dogs) and forego the special menu ($7.00-$9.00 dogs).

Doug at the counter

Doug, of Hot Doug fame, took our order and, after requesting two Chicago-style dogs, we asked him what on the menu we needed to eat before we died. Without hesitation he went right to the most expensive dog on the special menu – Foie Gras and Sauternes Duck Sausage with Truffle Aioli, Foie Gras Mousse and Fleur de Sel. (!)

I showed him our meager $15 and explained we were on a budget. He responded, “It’s my store. Let’s just pretend you have enough money, alright?” Then added with a smile, “I love doing this.” He grabbed $12 of our $15 on the counter, which was enough to pay for (only) our 3 hot dogs and went on, “You also need to have the Duck Fat Fries,” then closed his eyes as if imagining that he were eating them right there, “yes,” and nodded in agreement with himself.

“And grab some drinks while you’re at it.” I think we were both pretty confused with what had just hapened but we grabbed our drinks and had a seat.

Our discounted feast

The food was unusual and delicious, but I was more impressed by how nice Doug was. I’m sure I missed most of the nuanced subtleties of the luxury dog that Janele and I shared, but I certainly did notice the hunk of foie gras that fell off the dog into my root beer. Darn.

The foie gras in my root beer

All in all it was a fun experience, if a little long. We’ll definitely come back to Hot Doug’s again.

The Final Countdown

2010-05-11T11:46:00.003-06:00

Yesterday I sent Janelle a screenshot

of what the my next week or two

will entail. I can't say how nice it

will be to be done with this list.

Driven to Distraction

2010-03-29T21:11:00.003-06:00

This week I am trying an experiment. In order to finish my summer research proposal (Due Thursday) and not fail my upcoming Neuroscience exam this Monday morning, and keep reasonably up-to-date in my other classes, I am going to cut out the two most common time-wasting activities: Reading the "news", and playing Lux on my iPhone.

The news for a few reasons. First, I'm mostly reading it to procrastinate. I like the self-educationnews can provide, but that is secondary to my work avoidance. Also, every time divisive topics come up in the news, I find my ability to concentrate completely gone. I feel like I need to read every article as though eventually one of them will eventually will refute the facts I learned in the first article. Divisive political news does not lend itself to learning how the body works (at least not for me). Lastly, the "news" I read seems each day to be less about important world events, and more tech gossip, celebrity gossip, legal gossip and even political gossip. I can't justify that with all the other things I need to do.

Lux, a knockoff version of Risk, is available as a free version for the iPhone, which I have played relentlessly (to Janelle's, and my own, dismay). I openly use it as a coping mechanism for stress. It is completely ineffective though, as even after having won the game three times in a row, I still crave world domination just as fiercely as when I started. "Lux! I delete you!"
[I am now deleting this off my phone. You'll just have to trust me about that.]

I do sometimes need a break from the books, but I am determined to do that through more productive means. It's getting nicer so I might even try taking walk or two in our wetland trail. I don't know if I'll have time, but going for a run would be nice too. Any other suggestions for a quick (<10 minute) study break/stress buster?

Burnout...

2010-03-27T21:02:00.004-06:00

I have finished my third week back since Spring Break, and I'm not sure exactly why, but yesterday at about 5pm my brain decided there was nothing more it cared to do. Granted, Friday was a long day to cap off a long week. In retrospect I was probably burning myself out getting through what I was doing, but now that it is the weekend and I know I have no tests until a week from Monday, I can't seem to focus or keep on task at all.

I've pretty much given myself a pass for tonight, although I may try to read a few things for school. I just feel discouraged, distracted, and unmotivated. Oh, and stressed out. I hope it doesn't take me long to get back to normal.

Google Voice transcriptions

2010-03-02T08:56:00.004-07:00

I love Google Voice. One of my absolute favorite features is its ability to analyze the audio of a voicemail, and send it to you in an email. The service is still in beta-testing, which means it is still imperfect. This fact makes for some really great voicemails: Like the time Janelle said, "[...] um, and heading straight back over to school" but google sent it to me as "Yeah on. Hi Mr. Dot Com. That's cool."

The best one may have been what I got yesterday: "Call Koran corporate shallow be cautious. Your Hey there. Hey, Yeah and hey book. Hey, but hey, but hey, yeah, hi doesn't but yeah hey so."

The recorded message lasted two minutes and fourteen seconds. It involved no warning to be cautious, nothing about "Koran corporate", and no rambling greeting. This is why I love Google Voice, for constantly making my life sound so much more interesting that it actually is.

Soundtrack to a Medical Education

2009-12-05T18:58:00.013-07:00

I wanted to share the 15 songs that, so far, have saved my sanity and my GPA here at Midwestern University. After five months of studying, I have listened to these songs for over 116 hours (Yeah, I figured it out. What's it to ya?). For me, they provide the right balance of being interesting, having undistracting beats, and occasionally waking me a bit when I'm feeling dozy. For your enjoyment I present my studying soundtrack:

Mike Mills - Air
Lovers' Carvings - Bibio
No Distance Left To Run - Blur
Letters from the Sky - Civil Twilight
I Will Follow You Into The Dark - Death Cab For Cutie
Your Heart Is An Empty Room - Death Cab For Cutie
Transatlanticism - Death Cab For Cutie
Blind - Hercules and Love Affair
Bulletproof - La Roux
Gimme Sympathy - Metric
Knights Of Cydonia - Muse
Just - Radiohead
Buildings & Mountains - The Republic Tigers
Take Me To The Riot - Stars
Night Windows - The Weakerthans

Directions: 1) Listen, 2) Succeed, 3) Repeat.

The only other track that might be stealing my attention is "Brown Noise Loop" on the album White Noise Loops for Sleep. No music - it is just muffled noise sounds that keep you from paying attention to other sounds (like when people are laughing in the quiet study room, ahem), but it may been the best $0.99 I've spent in some time.

Back To School

2009-11-29T10:01:00.002-07:00

Oh, it can be hard to get back in the swing of things.

The week before thanksgiving I finished my finals for the quarter and I have spent this last week barely thinking about school (except for a couple days at the library). It has been refreshing to have my life back, even if the relief is temporary. What have I been up to?

Reading - I read two classic scifi books that JJ recommended. Thanks Bro.
Cooking - I have been entranced by The Joy of Cooking. There is an incredible amount of information and really tasty, easy recipes. I used its wisdom to roast carrots and asparagus one day, make Mongolian beef the next, and roast a turkey the next.
Studying - Come on, I can't take it too easy.
Lazing - It is really weird how different it feels to be so stressed out, and then to have all those stress hormones gone so quickly. It almost makes me wish I were done with school altogether. One day... one day.

It is hard to believe that tomorrow I will be back in classes until February. Unfortunately that is the truth.

Side note: For those who don't already know, this next quarter is understood to be the hardest quarter at our medical school. After a few weeks in December we break for Christmas and new years before coming back. When we get back we are greeted by exams right away. January of first year is known as Black January. From the 8th to the 22nd we have seven exams (seven in ten weekdays - two weeks). February heats up a little with finals (and the pre-finals exams) giving us ten exams in two weeks. I don't think anyone looks forward to that much studying.

A Great Start

2009-11-06T22:42:00.001-07:00

Last night I took my first one-on-one medical history in a simulated clinic setting. There was an actor portraying a patient with whom I interacted as though I were the doctor. I wanted to do a great job because it was my very first time in this role, but the first thing I did was knock the clock off the wall by closing the door too forcefully, leaving a pile of broken glass on the exam room floor and a no-longer-functional clock on the counter for housekeeping to replace.

I'm not a doctor yet, but I'm off to a great start.

Creepy Cloud Face (Old Spice and their Subliminal Tricks)

2009-11-02T18:21:00.004-07:00

I have an admission to make: Apparently I am a big stinkin' sucker for subliminal advertising. Apparently if someone smiles at me as I'm considering what to buy, I will buy it (even if it is a wall of barely disguised silly cloudy cartoon faces, each staring back at me from their own respective bottle of body wash). I wouldn't have believed it if I had not experienced what I relate below:

Sometimes when I am bored or really tired I look at things with random patterns and look for shapes and faces in the randomness (maybe while looking at a pattern in some tiles, or staring at the trees or some shadows or a pile of laundry). Sometimes the things I see are pretty neat and I am surprised how undeniably recognizable the random pattern or shape seems to be.

This occurred a few weeks ago when I looked closely at my Old Spice body wash bottle, but I am convinced it is actually a subliminal message to convince indecisive male shoppers that their product is happier. It is probably "supposed" to be clouds, but you can decide for yourselves if this is my imagination.

Do you see it?

===================================
Update: Since apparently no one is seeing the face here, I have used photoshop to make clear what I think are the eyebrows (and the shadows under them), the shadow under the nose, and the smile. You can also see what sort of looks like a faux-hawk, and a chin or tapering neck. I find it hard to think that the graphic designers who are making this product failed to notice they were drawing a face.

Does it still just look like clouds to you?

New Look

2009-10-28T19:17:00.039-06:00

Hey everyone,

So my watch arrived in all its golden glory and, even though I have tons to do, tomorrow evening is the "Stache Bash" that our campus club, Healthcare for All, is putting on, I am taking time now to prepare and share the fun. To Janelle's dismay (actually she's been really supportive), I opted to participate. Today was my shave. I hope you enjoy the watch and the moustache photos below. We had fun taking them.

First Draft.

In my mind this one is called something like "Furiously Imagining the Future"

(Also, my watch makes its glorious golden debut).

Very cool.

We laughed and laughed at this one, which would be the runner up for my author photo when I decide to write a book.

I think this photo ended up being just serious enough and was perfectly composed. Also note the perfect placement of the timepiece.

Say hello to the new Andrew.

I Need Feedback (and a new watch)

2009-10-14T20:18:00.002-06:00

Hey There Everyone,

So I need to buy a new watch so I have a way to measure heart rates (you know, with a second hand and all). After some deliberation, I have mostly settled on the Timex Classic due to its simplicity, reliability, and inexpensiveness. At first I thought I should get a gold-tone one because it seemed like a funny idea (like I should wear it with a corduroy blazer, helicopter glasses, and a mustache). Then I thought maybe I should be more conservative with a silver-tone version.

So now it is up to you, my trusted friends, family, and stalkers to help me weigh this issue. Would it be as funny as I imagine to get a gold-tone timex, or would the funny wear off right away, leaving me stuck with a watch I don't like? Or is there a third option I should follow? Please comment below.

So this is what it feels like to be a bleary-eyed medical student

2009-10-01T22:24:00.000-06:00

Since about 1:30 pm this afternoon my eyes have been screaming, "Andrew! Stop doing all this schoolwork. You are sleepy. Lay down right now and just don't worry about all this schoolwork nonsense." Now I finally get a chance to do just that (ten hours later).

Brain Mush

2009-09-29T22:08:00.000-06:00

I really enjoy school, but that doesn't mean my brain doesn't turn to mush sometimes. Yesterday I was taking a practice Histology test that involved looking at pictures and identifying what I was looking at. I thought one of the pictures was part of a hair follicle. It was a taste bud. Yeah those are pretty much the same, right?

Histology

2009-09-27T19:24:00.001-06:00

This is the study of microscopic anatomy (cells). I think it is interesting, but it is just a lot of looking at cells. I've done pretty well so far, but it has also been kind of easy. That doesn't include the exam tomorrow, nor the one on Tuesday... or is it on Wednesday? I'll check on that date. Point is, there are two exams this week and I have prepared for neither one to my satisfaction.

It is also the one class where I most often find myself on the verge of slipping into unconsciousness. Most classes that last 3+ hours get us standing up and doing something to keep us active. This one we just sit in a darkened room with powerpoint's warming glow, and listen to the droning sounds of teachers, coffee mugs, and bored student chatter... hour after hour...

Osteopathic Manipulative Medicine

2009-09-23T22:27:00.000-06:00

First, this is my favorite course name ever. Manipulative medicine? That is hilarious.

The class is less hilarious than the name. Osteopathic manipulative medicine is what makes the main difference between DO physicians and MD physicians. It involves the diagnosis and manipulation (ie, moving things around in the body) of somatic dysfunction (which is basically when things in the body like bones don't move exactly the way they are supposed to, which can cause symptoms in some people). I feel totally lost in this class. Since most problems are in the back, we are touching a lot of people's backs. The problem is that everything just feels like "back" to me. I have not elevated my sense of touch to "good back" and "bad back," but I'll need to if I plan on passing this class, which I need to do to graduate. You can bet I'm going to work hard on figuring that out.

Biochemistry

2009-09-21T22:26:00.001-06:00

Biochem is a weird class. There is simply no way around it. After one month of class, we have heard much more about teamwork, the importance of personal reflection and the need for close relationships, than we have about anything biochemical. I think we've heard maybe 5-10 minutes of lecture on the chemistry so far, but that should change now (so I hear). This class has tons of requirements that must be accomplished as groups.

History of Medicine

2009-09-19T22:25:00.001-06:00

I stopped attending lecture. So did most of my classmates. I kind of hate that I'm not there because it is quite interesting, but I figure if they wanted us to be there, they would give us a reason to go. Our entire grade is based off a paper that has nothing to do with the class, except that it has to be on a topic of medical history. Pass/fail class based on whether or not we turn in a paper.

Gentlemen Bronchos (Watch. This. Trailer.)

2009-09-16T23:12:00.002-06:00

There are some movies that you are pretty sure you're going to fall in love with mere seconds after the trailer starts.

This is one of those movies for me.

In fact, we are already planning on attending the premier (in 6 weeks) based solely off this trailer.

I am ashamed to say how many times I've watched this trailer already.

I defy you to not smile while watching it. Yes, I defy you.
-Andrainus

Here's more in case you just caught the bug like I did:

http://ronaldchevalier.com/

Dr. Ronald Chevalier - Inspiring Oneself

Anatomy

2009-09-15T22:22:00.001-06:00

Not a ton to say. Lecture comes at you hard and fast, labs leave you stinky no matter how many showers you take and no matter how many times you wash your hands, even though you are wearing two layers of gloves. I don't understand it. Pretty interesting... if you're into that kind of thing.

School

2009-09-13T22:22:00.000-06:00

So I decided to write about what my life is like right now partly for everyone to know what school is like, and partly just to have a little reminder years down the road when I've forgotten what it was like being in my first year of medical school.

After our first mini semester (a month of reduced course load to help us ease into medical school), affectionately referred to as the harbor because there are no waves rocking the proverbial boat yet, I have now finished a week of real school.

One class, an introduction to Psychiatry, is already over! I had my finals just over a week ago, which means my midterm, which counted for 50% of my grade in the course, was less than two weeks after our first period together.

I'm no longer in Psychiatry, but Biochemistry, Histology, Anatomy, History of Medicine, Osteopathic Manipulative Medicine, and Gross Anatomy are all continuing into our first full quarter. This quarter also has two new classes: Healthcare Issues, and Introduction to Clinical Medicine. In total I will spend 33 hours a week actually sitting in class, plus homework, plus studying, plus exams, plus some mandatory group meetings for classes, plus lunchtime meetings (these are usually accompanied by free food, so they aren't too bad). I have also joined several different student and professional organizations (AMSA, AMA, ISMS, CHS, HFA, SOMA). Most don't require any time. I'll post more detail in the coming days.

Shouldn't this be some kind of holiday?

2009-09-09T09:09:00.002-06:00

9:09:09 of 09/09/09
I can't imagine how exciting this would be for someone turning nine years old today. That is one lucky kiddo.

13 hours, 5 minutes

2009-09-02T18:09:00.000-06:00

I just realized/found out that the test I've been studying for all yesterday and today isn't tomorrow. It is on Friday morning. The test that I haven't started studying for yet is tomorrow. At 8:10 am I have a biochemistry exam. That gives me roughly 13 hours and 5 minutes to prepare for it (and sleep).

{rolling eyes}

Last Weekend (Classes start Monday)

2009-08-08T12:43:00.001-06:00

Today is my last Saturday before starting my first classes of med school. Orientation is over, I have my school supplies, and now I'm simply waiting for the assignments to start flowing. A few people have asked how I feel right now, so I will share what it feels like to be in my shoes.

Generally speaking, the time leading up to the start of classes is an exercise in extremes of confidence. The individuals in our entering class are accustomed to being above average through most of their educations, and we are now coming to recognize to different degrees that our former perspectives on our relative intelligence are now outdated. At the same time, we are all hard workers, dedicated to becoming physicians, prepared as well as we could prepare for the next several years of learning.

At certain times I feel like I have some indistinct advantage over my peers; usually after reflecting on some marvelous former accomplishments, astute observations, or my sheer willpower to succeed. Then I recall failures, missed chances, and my heretofore untested ability to master over twenty credit hours a quarter, where getting 70% means failing a class -- thoughts that usually bring my confidence crashing back to the floor. Suddenly my school's 95% pass rate doesn't look as easy as it sounds.

In the end, all that is left to do is rationally think through what I've gotten myself tied up into. I know that in general terms, I am not inferior to my classmates in intelligence, work ethic, dedication nor stamina. I feel at peace with my decision to come here and with the work it will require to be successful, and I have everything I need in order to achieve that success.

In short it feels like I about to jump off the high platform, knowing that at least nineteen out of twenty people survive the fall just fine.

Welcome to Chicago

2009-08-04T21:59:00.002-06:00

It's been a few days since I've had a chance to blog and I figure, with classes starting this Monday, it's now or never.

First, we made it. It took a total of 24 hours in the rental truck with my mom and Brittany driving our car right behind us. We got to Downers Grove on Wednesday evening and have been incredibly impressed with our entire experience thus far. Our place is lovely in a quiet, beautiful neighborhood. We are a block or two from Main Street, which is filled with great shops, restaurants, a bowling alley, a beautiful old single-screen theatre, and an express train to downtown Chicago. Tonight I went running and found out we even have fireflies! Not so few that you never see them, but not so many that they lose their novelty. We've got great neighbors who have made us very welcome, we had help getting our place put together very well (our curtains are now hanging!) and we feel right at home.

I'm two days into my schools' orientation (four days of long boring lectures of things that are important to know, but boring to learn). I hear it is better than classes, so I'm trying to avoid being ungrateful. Our class of 200 is also getting to know one another. It will be nice to get to know everyone a little better.

One thing that has been especially nice is to start feeling even closer to my awesome wife. I have been quite impressed with her and feel like she will become an even larger part of my life through this whole experience we're sharing. I am truly grateful we are doing this together. Now we just need those educations.

Big Changes Coming

2009-07-16T22:54:00.001-06:00

Today was my last day of working at Primary Childrens Medical Center microbiology lab. It is hard to work your last day at a job you enjoy. Often when you leave a job you leave when you dislike the work environment or the people you work with or something. It is much harder when you don't dislike anything at work and really enjoy the time you spend with your coworkers.

All that just to say that it will probably be a difficult transition as we go to a city where we don't have family, friends, or coworkers already in place once we arrive. It will be good in the long run, but not necessarily easy at first.

For those who haven't heard, we're moving to Chicago in less than 2 weeks. Wow that is coming quick.

TV

2009-05-28T10:10:00.000-06:00

I don't watch much TV. In fact, I don't even own a TV. That said, I think my favorite channel on TV is Discovery Health. The other day I was at the gym and the program playing was 'I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant' about women going into labour without knowing that they were even pregnant.

'Nuff said.

Email From an Old Friend? Not So Fast!

2009-05-15T06:56:00.001-06:00

Last night/this morning at 12:05, I got an email from an old friend that I used to play in a band with, but who since moved to DC for school and I've barely heard a thing from him for several years. The email was addressed to contacts with names or emails starting "a" through "c".

It read as follows:

How are you doing? I am sorry, but I travelled to England for a Seminar and I am stranded here. I need a favour from you because i was robbed by a taxi driver who drove off with my bag where my money,and other valuable things were kept. I hate to bother you, but i will like you to assist me with a loan urgently of about $2,670 USD to sort-out myself back home.
I will appreciate whatever you can afford and i'll pay you back as soon as i return,Kindly let me know if you can be of help? so that i can send you the Details to use when sending the money through western union or money gram since that's what works here in England.

Thank you

Brian

There is something hilarious to me about internet scams, but I should probably facebook him to let him know his account's been hacked.

Anxiety and Excitement

2009-05-04T06:52:00.002-06:00

So far I have had two dreams about what life will be like being in school again this fall.

In the first, I arrived at school to find that "school" was actually just some guy in his garage talking about health and medicine with nine or ten of us who I guess got duped into paying tuition. This dream did not leave me very excited about the fall.

In the second, my school was this amazing Utopian community with all white marble palaces for classrooms surrounded with beautiful green fields full of eager students walking to their classes. I know, eh? Pretty impressive. To make things even better, when I got to class, and was sitting in the crowd, I started looking around and realized that some of my best friends from over the years were sitting scattered all around me. We had a joyous reunion and were all there studying and working together. I can't imagine a happier way to start off a return to school.

Generally I don't believe dreams should be used to predict the future, but sometimes I think dreams are pretty good at pointing out the things that I am both scared silly about, and very excited about (especially when they are about things that we have yet to experience). In this case, I am scared silly about heading back to class, and also incredibly eager to start this new chapter of life.

Looking for that Receipt

2009-05-01T17:04:00.002-06:00

Like many married couples, Janelle always wants it warmer than what I like. This means that as summer heats up, I get unbearably hot, and Janelle becomes happier. To help appease me as summer starts arriving we decided to use a Wal-Mart gift card we'd been saving and buy a fan. When it broke only a few days after we got it, I was disappointed, but not terribly so, since I knew we could get a full refund.

I unplugged the fan and asked Janelle for the receipt.

"You haven't taken out the recycling yet, right?" she asked.

"Why? Did you throw it out?"

"Yeah, I am pretty sure I did, but at least we still have it, right? It is just somewhere in our recycling."

Knowing that it just as well could have been me who tossed the receipt, I earnestly went to work this morning going through our entire garbage bag of recycling, item by item, looking for our receipt. Is it in this old olive can?, nope. Maybe stuffed in the macaroni box? Nope.

With boxes, cans and papers spread over the floor and counters, it was nowhere to be found. I called Janelle again. "Are you sure you put it in the recycling?"

"Well, not entirely. You probably won't like what I'm going to tell you, but It might be on the kitchen table in a stack of papers."

Sure enough, my baby was right. The receipt had been right there the entire time (while I was sorting through our recycling just inches away).

Armed with my receipt, I was able to return our fan for the refund. Now if only I could find a good, reliable fan.

Universal Health Care

2009-04-29T22:33:00.001-06:00

Janelle was reading status updates on facebook earlier this evening and came across this:

"[Dr. Schauffhausen] is amazed how people think universal health care will somehow improve care. It is just a different form of insurance payments. There are actual things we can do to improve health, and I'm pretty sure insurance has nothing to do with it." {name has been changed}

As someone who knows that universal health care comes with a trade-off, but still thinks everyone should be able to see a doctor, I was really disappointed to hear this. For people in the upper half of society universal health care will not improve health care, because you are already insured. Try living without health care for a year, however, and you will know how millions of Americans live. Any health care is better than slowly dying and not being able to do anything about it.

Despite my knowledge that I will cover some of that cost, I think the trade-off is worth the peace of mind in knowing that everyone has an equal chance.

Obviously this is something I feel passionately about. If this post makes you feel like you need to say something (either side of the issue), I would like to know your thoughts (I'll try to be open-minded).

Swine Flu: Thoughts from the Microbiology Lab

2009-04-27T21:04:00.001-06:00

Swine Flu Strikes!

This new strain of the flu has taken over the headlines. Its discovery is so recent that we don't know much about its geography, how dangerous it is, and whether it is dying down or flaring up. As a microbiology lab employee, I figured I'd share a little about this crazy new virus.

Despite how recently this strain was discovered, here is a little bit of what we do know about Swine Flu (AKA Pig Flu).

It does seem to be new
   Genetic testing indicates that this virus is "triply recombinant" (meaning it has DNA from three animals, that normally isn't in the flu). Besides its normal Flu DNA, it has Human DNA, Pig DNA, and Bird DNA (which has led us in the lab to start calling it 'Pete's Dragon Flu').

It is treatable
   If, knock on wood, you do end up getting the flu, all is not lost (so far the deaths in Mexico you've been getting all worked up about are all in patients who didn't know there even was such a thing as Pig Flu). Now that the alarm has been raised, your doctor will be considering the possibility of Pig Flu if you do get flu-like symptoms. In the tiny chance that you really get it, this strain has been proven to be susceptible to several antivirals (neuraminidase inhibitors like asoseltamivir and zanamivir).

Its prevalence is very low (for now)
   When start feeling like you've got "the flu," what you actually have is probably one of the viruses that cause the same sorts of "achy-muscle, gong-in-your-head, just-want-to-lay-down, I-can't-breathe" symptoms. When you feel this way you might have
-Parainfluenza (1, 2 or 3),
   -Adenovirus,
      -Metapneumovirus (MPV),
         -Influenza (A or B -- the flu), or
            -Respiratory Syncytial Virus (RSV).
   Since they all feel just as terrible when you are infected, the only way to know what you have is to get lab work done. If the lab determines your virus is actually Influenza A, they will take it to the Health Department and they can tell you what strain it is. If it is actually Flu A:H1N1, sorry, but it might be Swine Flu (which is treatable, remember. Don't give up hope).

In case I haven't calmed your nerves enough, here are some graphs (updated last week) of the prevalence of all the Flu A (top) and Flu B (bottom), in the greater Salt Lake area.

Basically, Flu A (which includes Pig Flu) has petered right out for the year, and Flu B is going down, but still around. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't see this whole Pig Flu thing destroying the world... yet.

A Villanelle on "The Contents of My Pockets"

2009-04-23T15:11:00.001-06:00

By Andrew

The contents of my pockets cannot last,

The feelings in my heart are not yet spent,
Be close forever and for ages past.

My phone is new (the fourth!) and it is fast.
I know not where its predecessors went.
The contents of my pockets cannot last.

My bleeding lips thank heaven for elast…
…icity that my
lip balm there has meant.
Be close forever and for ages past.

Once shrined in tape, now risen from its caste,
My wallet,
it was broken, it was bent.
The contents of my pockets cannot last.

The keys I carry have but little massed
That space, for years,
I’ve hardly put to rent.
Be close forever and for ages past.

Belongings I have carried, saved and glassed:
perhaps some few ought not be kept, but sent.
The contents of my pockets cannot last.

Be close forever and for ages past.

A Quatrain on Gratitude

2009-04-21T23:57:00.000-06:00

By Andrew

Remember how you felt at dawn's first light.
Remember that your freedoms are a right.
Remember that your life is what you choose,
And people are a gift you cannot lose.

Emergency Announcment!

2009-04-20T19:25:00.000-06:00

Yep. I'm legal.

What is Osteopathic Medicine?

2009-04-20T06:45:00.004-06:00

Many of you have heard that I am going to medical school later this summer. I am really excited and a little nervous about the whole thing. I decided to attend Chicago's College of Osteopathic Medicine (CCOM) at Midwestern University and I figured I would give a little background on osteopathic medicine, since I've been asked quite a bit already.

Osteo...pathic? Is that a bone doctor?

Well, sort of. Osteopathic medicine was started in the late 1800s by a physician named Andrew Taylor Still. He was an MD who became disillusioned with how medicine was being practiced after the death of several family members. Discouraged with the inadequacies of medicine, Dr. Still took a step back from his contemporaries and tried to re-examine health care with a fresh perspective.

His search for improved medical care brought him to examine problems with skeletal arrangement. When bones (especially the spine) are slightly out of place, they can pinch nearby nerves that lead to organs. In these cases, adjusting the spine can help organs work properly by improving their signal from the central nervous system. This technique can spare patients the side effects of drugs that treat that organ's deficiency. The practice of manipulating bones was a major differentiation between osteopathic ("osteo-" meaning bone, and "-pathy" meaning sickness) medicine, and medicine practiced by A. T. Still's MD colleagues, who would often focus only on treating symptoms. In this respect, A. T. Still wanted to change the focus from treating symptoms to treating the patient's underlying problem.

So osteopathic doctors don't use drugs or surgery?

Actually, Dr. Still eventually concluded that these spinal manipulation techniques did not adequately address many medical problems, so he began reincorporating mainstream medicine back into his practice using drugs and surgery, as well as the osteopathic manipulative medicine. In order to advance this new direction in medicine, Dr. Still started the first osteopathic medical school in 1892.

In the end, the branch of medicine he initiated strives to differentiate itself from medicine as practiced by MDs through the occasional use off spinal manipulation, a focus on recognizing that quality health care must address a person's physical, social, and emotional needs, and a recognition that treating only a patient's symptoms leads to inferior health care. The majority of both MDs and DOs see each other as colleagues and neither branch claims to be the sole provider of high-quality medicine.

So what is a "DO"?

Graduates from osteopathic medical schools are often referred to as "DOs" in reference to their medical degree: DO (Doctor of Osteopathic Medicine) which they receive instead of MD. After graduation, DO medical doctors choose to become board certified either through the same three-year residencies as their MD counterparts, or through similar osteopathic three-year residencies.

During the eleven decades since A. T. Still set up the first osteopathic medical school, osteopathic medicine has aligned itself increasingly with "MD" medicine as both have incorporated new procedures that are supported by legitimate medical research.

DOs are licensed physicians throughout North America, board certified in their respective specialties (such as surgery, anesthesiology, or any other specialty), and are neither homeopathic/naturopathic practitioners, nor restricted to working with bones. Also, DOs should not be confused with "osteopaths" whose practice a form of alternative medicine called "osteopathy." Although osteopathy and osteopathic medicine have shared origins, the educational requirements, philosophy, and scope of practice for osteopaths are much different from osteopathic physicians.

I'd love to hear if you have any questions about osteopathic medicine and, if I don't know the answer to your question, I'll make sure to find it!

My Wife, the Half-Marathoner

2009-04-19T19:30:00.017-06:00

1) Janelle's Number & Running Gear (morning of the race)
2) Hundreds gathering for the race just before it started

3) Thousands more pouring out of a Trax car (seriously, the most jam-packed train ride I've ever been on).
4) The official pre-race portrait...

5) Followed by the pre-race couple's portrait (I insisted).
6) Janelle cruising past us at liberty park. Run Janelle, Run!

7) Janelle just after crossing the finish line. That girl in pink was hogging the spotlight, so just look behind her. Janelle is in black.
8) The post-race couple's portrait. Doesn't she look great!

A Couplet on Birds in Flight

2009-04-14T07:13:00.007-06:00

By Andrew

Your wheeling turns are high and oh so free
but, tiny birds, you are too small to see.

A Haiku on Imagination

2009-04-13T09:04:00.005-06:00

By Andrew

My mind overflows.
Ideas that might have been
or that may yet be.

One of my great childhood accomplishments

2009-04-10T21:49:00.006-06:00

My grade five teacher, Mrs. McKenzie, was pushing our limits. She ambitiously created a major school project that was designed to help us learn the basics of several different styles of poetry and when we finished our respective poems, each child bound their own poems (and only their own) into a custom-made book. I still have mine. When I think back on school projects that made me happy, few come close to my grade five poetry book. I was plunged into a world I barely knew, and loved stumbling through the creative process using literary guidelines I barely understood.

Which leads me to:
I am going to take up the reins of my poetry once more. Or at least I'm going to plan on it until it becomes too inconvenient (hey, lets be honest, right?). I figure I'm not much more qualified to write poetry now than when I was eleven, so my expectations are only moderately higher. That, I think, makes me even more eager to get started -- I have absolutely nothing to lose. My first undertaking:

A Limerick on Poetry
By Andrew

My task is still new and exciting
with doubts of my skill quite a-frighting.
The back of my mind
is both empty and blind,
but in trying you better your writing.

Who knew when I spent this...

2009-04-10T07:53:00.002-06:00

... that it would probably be the best three dollars I ever spent?

Although I did not need it, this was one of those things I dug up to substantiate my marriage for my green card interview yesterday. Even though it went unused for the interview and everything, I was glad to have had an excuse to find it.

(This was the ticket for the movie we watched for our first real date)

"How can I prove my love for you?"

2009-04-08T21:37:00.009-06:00

Although that sounds like the title track for an awesome power ballad, it is actually the phrase that repeats in my mind as I contemplate tomorrow morning's Green Card Interview. Yeah. Talk about pressure.

Apparently there are evil-minded conspirators who treat marriage so lightly that they get married (technically) without having fallen in love. This interview is designed to determine whether Janelle and I are these shallow souls, or whether we are joined in a bona fide marriage of love. Tomorrow morning therefore, it is my task to "prove my love for Janelle" to the government of the United States of America.

I can't imagine it going anything other than smoothly, so I am excited to have it happen and be over with, but part of me still hopes that we have at least a few minor hangups -- just enough to keep it interesting, you know? One thing I've imagined happening a few times over in my head is "forgetting" Janelle's name as I am answering a question, or referring to "that cute young woman that was just in here." Janelle is probably not excited that I have even thought of these things because it will make it more likely to happen. She is probably right too.

I have looked over the types of questions they supposedly ask and can't imagine having a difficult time answering them. I guess that is one of the perks of knowing and loving the person you marry.

Reading in the Park

2009-04-07T18:22:00.006-06:00

All day today I have been jealously thinking of my friends and family who haven't spent the entire day locked in a windowless box, like me.
Days like today are about as perfect as I can imagine. It's comfortable, but not hot, with a cool breeze. I have a good book to read. I have time to read, a park to enjoy, and for at least a little while, not a care in the world.

Chicago!

2009-04-05T16:34:00.005-06:00

For all those who have not already heard, Janelle and I decided to go to school in Chicago, Illinois!

I am going to be attending Midwestern University's College of Osteopathic Medicine, and my wife, Janelle, will be going to Chicago-Kent School of Law. We still don't know where exactly we will be living, but Downers Grove, IL (the suburb where we'll be living -- I know, downer of a name) seems like a nice area, so I am pretty sure we will be happy with whatever we find.

We will be leaving Salt Lake City for Illinois sometime in mid- to late July. It will be sad to leave all the family and friends we have nearby, but sometimes you just need to take the plunge. We are both pretty excited.

Two Weeks

2009-03-21T10:11:00.003-06:00

Not too long ago I heard that they made contact lenses that you can leave in your eyes for a month at a time. The last time I was visiting my optometrist (he was checking how my new contacts were fitting) I asked him if they really existed. He responded that indeed they do, and that even the ones I was getting were FDA approved for two weeks of continuous wear. Yeah, TWO WEEKS at a time!

That is a whole pay period.
That is enough time to run 40 miles doing half marathon training.
That is long enough to quit your job!

Needless to say, I didn't take those contacts out for two weeks, and I'm not sure I will ever be able to return to a daily contact lens routine.

If you happen to be a consumer of Accuvue Oasys contact lenses, don't be a fool: wear your contacts for two weeks straight.

I'm tired and in bed

2009-03-13T15:17:00.002-06:00

And I barely have the energy to use my phone.

If this works...

2009-03-13T13:44:00.002-06:00

... I am mobile blogging.

In the Barber Shop

2009-03-07T12:24:00.003-07:00

Yesterday I went for my quarterly visit to the barber. It could have been a Norman Rockwell.

As I sat, shooting the breeze with the person cutting my hair, a second man came in to the shop with a young little girl. Being too young to be separated from her father for his entire haircut, she found a place sitting on his lap, but facing him.He pulled his smock up to let her sit on the knee of his blue jeans and watch the action. Eventually a third barber finished with his client and, without any other clients to attend to, he came and began to engage the young child as her father and I were getting our haircuts by his colleagues.

"Hello there. What's your name?" He asked.

"Mara."

"That is a nice name. And how old are you?"

"I'm two."

"Did you know I have a daughter that is your age, and her name is Maya?"

Little kids are sometimes frightened by strangers and, although she seemed to enjoy the conversation for a little while, this last inquiry caused her to slowly collapse forward into the comfort of her father's chest -- the same chest that was catching the hair from her father's head.

Father gently pulled her away, only to reveal her face thickly covered with his former black hair sticking in a patchy little beard. She wasn't agitated or sad. Just smiling there, happy her dad was near and oblivious to the beard across her face.

The barbers got as much off as they could, while everyone in the shop laughed. She seemed totally fine with the experience, only occasionally saying "ow" when the few remaining hairs made her face itch to much.

If haircuts were that funny every time, I'd be going to the barber every month.

Curses!

2009-01-24T15:08:00.008-07:00

If you don't know me very well, you won't know that I thoroughly enjoy playing games. I've been told that people from colder climates tend to like board games more since that is all there is to do during the frigid winter months. That might be true.

The other night my little sis had a birthday and we played a new game that is sure to be a hit with anyone who enjoys being silly. It's called "Curses!" Basically you just have to do simple little tasks each turn, but as you go you accumulate more and more curses.

For example
You have no elbows. don't bend your elbows.
AND You become scared and faint every time a bell rings.
AND Everything you say must be spoken through clenched teeth.
AND You must speak in a high falsetto.
AND every time you read a card you must slap yourself in the face.
AND also, you are Santa. So tell everyone in the room what they are getting for Christmas.

Granted it isn't a game for everyone, but for those of us for whom it is, it is quite the game.

SomethingQuil

2009-01-23T10:47:00.007-07:00

Yesterday I started feeling sick: exhausted, uncomfortable and grumpy. Knowing that not taking a break would make me feel sicker, I took the evening easy and mostly rested. Unfortunately, in the middle of the night I woke up and could not fall back asleep. Eventually (around 2am) I decided to take something to make me groggy and get rid of the headache I had. I sleepily stumbled to the bathroom and grabbed a NyQuil to sooth me back to sleep.

Only problem: I took the yellow pill instead of the blue one. Yeah, DayQuil.

I realized the mistake almost immediately and ran back to bed. I figured if I could fall back asleep quickly the stimulants might not wake me when they kicked in. My plan almost worked. I managed to fall asleep for a good hour, but after that I was alert and awake (even if I did feel much less sick).

Let me assure you, that will be the last time in a long time that I confuse those two.

Etch-a-sketch

2008-12-21T00:28:00.004-07:00

On the last couple days, this piece of artwork has come up a couple times in conversation. I believe it was completed in 2005 on a Sunday morning as I was waiting for church to start. When I finished the picture (which took about 3 hours or so to do) I kept it safe for several month before finally shaking it up.

Since then, I have never undertaken a new etch-a-sketch, because I almost feel like I can't really live up to doing something so great again. Maybe that is true and maybe it isn't, but challenges from friends have started me thinking about giving it another try, whether or not I can make it as awesome as this one.

No More Procrastination

2008-12-18T18:45:00.005-07:00

If they didn't give us a deadline I would have kept procrastinating a little longer (I have an insatiable appetite for procrastination). But they did give a deadline and, since I want to be a doctor more than I want to procrastinate, I chose [...drumroll...] the Des Moines University College of Osteopathic Medicine.
Starting in August of next year, Janelle and I will (most likely) be going to Exotic Des Moines, Iowa for a little bit of Edumacating. It might take some getting to love, but I think we feel pretty settled about the whole decision.

Voice I still hear in my head: "Des Moines? Really? Of all the faraway and interesting place with medical schools in the whole world? And you are going to school in Iowa? How did that happen?"

Stating the Obvious

2008-12-06T08:17:00.011-07:00

Ever since I was a missionary, I have found it really funny when things that needn't be stated apparently need to be stated. Missionary rule example:

Missionaries are to sleep in the same room, but not in the same bed."

They make me laugh because I can only assume that somewhere, at some time, it was not quite obvious enough to someone, and so the powers that be had to go and state the obvious.

Yesterday I was changing the sheets and decided to cut off the labels from my pillow (because I really don't like extraneous tags). Here I found a suggestion for pillow care that I had never stumbled across before. Something that I never would have assumed needed stating: Do Not Iron.

Please tell me that none of us have ironed pillows tucked away in our pillow cases. I for one will never make fun of someone else's wrinkly pillows again; really, they are only following the rules.

Sidenote: Getting a scan of this pillow tag is a good example of why I believe it is essential for every home to have a scanner.

Where the flu be at

2008-11-20T19:18:00.016-07:00

I recently learned that Google.org has made a foray into monitoring respiratory viral trends. Although the data is only an approximation of flu trends and cannot account for the fact that several viruses are actually responsible for flu-like symptoms (the data comes from users' flu-related searches), it is pretty darn accurate, it is pretty darn fast, and it is pretty darn cool. It also has the benefit of covering the entirety of the U. S. of A.
Check out Google's FluTrends: google.org/flutrends

This contrasts with the Intermountain Healthcare version, which relies on hard data from clinical laboratory tests (like the ones I perform) on real patient samples to determine which viruses are present. While it is incredibly accurate, it does take more than a single day to get the data online. It also is limited to the areas served by Intermountain Healthcare. Unlike Google Inc., however, This site shows the spread of individual respiratory viruses, pertussis, enteric parasites like giardia and cryptosporidium, enteric viruses, and other gastrointestinal pathogens.
Check out IHC's GermWatch: intermountain.net/portal/site/mdvsi/

I guess I just think it is cool because I've always had a secret fascination with infectious disease. Maybe it will be as interesting for you as it is for me.

Perhaps it is odd to ask, but does anyone have any thoughts on what makes one better than the other?

In Memoriam (1995-2008)

2008-11-16T16:06:00.005-07:00

I recently sold my first, and so far only, bass amp: a Sunn SB160 60-watt Vintage amp.
This amp was purchased in 1995 and was already "old" when I first got it. It was bought to accompany my still wonderful Ibanez Soundgear (model SG1600, I believe). It has been with me through thousands of hours of practicing and who-knows-how-many dozens of shows in several cities over twelve years.

I know it was time to let it go--I never use it anymore, and it isn't easy to accommodate in a crowded apartment--but it is still a little sad to see it go after so long playing together.

Maybe one day I'll regret having let it go, but by then I'll be a billionaire, and I'll be able to buy it back, and get a new Brite button to replace the one it never had when I owned it.

Goodbye SB160.

Just a Little Bit of Christmas

2008-11-14T16:19:00.003-07:00

Today I came online in Gmail while two of my sisters were also online. We had a group chat. If you haven't tried this yet (make sure it with people you love), it is super fun. Invariably two people will respond to each question that anyone poses and if only exaggerates the feeling that normal chats give: that the two sides of the conversation don't quite match up.

We talked about Christmas. Since most of the family has gotten married this last year, all our plans are getting more complicated. As we discussed our plans to get together with my siblings for our "family Christmas" celebrations, we eventually turned to discussing last year's events.

Since I was out in CA for the 25th, we decided to make Christmas morning on the 27th, which was after my return to UT. Unfortunately, my schedule isn't super flexible sometimes. So I think I still needed to be at work by 7 or 8 am. This meant that from the time we got everyone awake, to the moment that I had to leave for work, Christmas morning lasted about twenty minutes.

But what a twenty minutes.

Primary Presentation

2008-11-09T12:16:00.007-07:00

Ha ha ha. Janelle wanted to blog about this first, but I can't resist (and Janelle "doesn't blog on Sundays").

Today was the primary presentation in church (Janelle works with primary kids). It went really well with only the most common of usual hangups: kids refusing to participate, forgetting their lines, and making weird faces without knowing they are making weird faces.

My very favorite line from the entire thing, however: "When Jesus visited the Neptunes..."

Pomona Lodge (The Atrocities of the)

2008-11-05T21:54:00.008-07:00

Good day kind readers. So last month I [actually Janelle] finagled my [our] way into staying at one of the nicest hotels I have ever enjoyed. In fact I have spent several nights at extremely comfortable lodgings since getting married. Quite nice and quite fun. All this to give some contrast to the Pomona Lodge.

Two weeks ago I was visiting Pomona to consider a campus there and meet with some administrators, blah blah blah. Janelle booked my stay and asked me if I wanted to stay somewhere cheaper or nicer. Already feeling guilty about traveling around the country without her, I opted for cheaper.

My flight arrived late and by the time my cab pulled up to The Lodge I was already ready for bed. After paying Amani, my cab driver, I waved goodbye and went to check in at the main office. This is when I realized I would have been better off having Amani take me somewhere else. Oops. The office was about 6'X7' and small enough that, with my luggage in tow, I couldn't close the door behind me. There was only two features: a bulletproof teller-style check-in and 1000 tourist pamplets.

I knew that the evening was too far gone to make other arrangements, so I decided to grit my teeth and just make it work (in the interest of getting lots of sleep and ensuring that the next day would go smoothly). As I walked up to the glass, I saw a sign taped on the inside: "No Drug Deals, No Prostitution." For some reason neither rule made me feel any better.

"I have a reservation," I stammered, knowing this could be a big mistake. "Under 'Andrew Olsen'."
"113," the old Indian man said, returning my credit card and room key.
"Thank you," I replied dishonestly.

As I approached the motel door, a shiny old black sedan (read "pimpmobile") pulled up behind me, headlights on my back.
"Hey!"
Still fumbling with my keys I realized that I couldn't get into my room fast enough to prevent him from shooting me if that was what was his plan.
"Yeah?"
"How much are the rooms here?"
"Fifty-five a night," I replied, wondering if he was hoping for something hourly.
"Are they clean?"
"I'm not sure. I've never stayed here before."
I already felt like I needed a long, hot shower.

That seemed enough to satisfy him and, as he left, I concentrated on getting into the room before being approached again. Key at the ready, my eyes turned to the handle where an ambiguous brown crust was caked onto the handle I needed to pass through. Fortunately I managed to open the door without touching anything but the key. The room, however, wasn't much better.

The immediate insult against my senses was olfactory. Smoke and mold, yes mostly those... but with an unmistakable aroma of old urine. I considered leaving, but was very tired, and knew it would be nearly impossible to find a cab in a bad neighborhood before getting mugged. Besides, I probably wouldn't get shot as long as my door was locked.

As a microbiology lab employee I was keenly aware of potential infections all around me, so the remainder of my stay was paranoia and trying to breathe and touch as little as possible. As I prepared for bed I tried to eliminate the chance of letting my skin touch the sheets. Already well covered, I was thankful to have a pillow from home which adequately protected my face from the toxins and infectious agents that were eagerly waiting to burrow into my skin and give me a weird rash or cause uncomfortable lesions. The night passed slowly, but passed nonetheless.

The only real upside of the entire experience was that, as I checked out the following day, I once more met the old Indian man who checked me in. Learning that I was preparing to go back to school, he gave me an Indian blessing that I would be able to go to school where I wanted to go. It was fun and kind of cool, but I'm not sure if it made up for a night of worrying that, through no fault of my own, I would wake up a host to some new parasite.

Elections: The Countdown

2008-11-03T22:25:00.005-07:00

Twenty-four hours from now it will pretty much be over. All the hubbub will be meaningless and, for better of for worse, we will be stuck with someone for another four years. Most everyone has made their decisions, so this might be more for me than you, but it is important that I at least express my thoughts on this election.

I recently came across the election-related thoughts of a person who I admire in many ways, but with whom I disagree strongly about politics (Now that I think about it, many of my family members and close friends see politics very differently from me. Moving on...). He outlined his logic for supporting McCain/Palin in a message that relied only on the potential dangers that Obama poses for the future of America, while acknowledging the almost-inexcusable deficiencies of the Republican ticket.

We need to stand up for our politics and express what we want, not belittle a political opponent and call it voting logic. I am uncomfortable defining myself only by what I am against. Granted no candidate is perfect, and each will have his flaws, but if we focus on what America needs we may find someone who will get us going in the right direction.

I want a president that considers the following:

The financial markets need to correct their root flaws (I believe both candidates will be similar in this respect)
Health care that gets its moneys' worth (America gets the worst return on its health care dollar of all industrialized countries - increasing the pool size decreases the per-person cost)
Health care that helps everyone (try living without health insurance for a year and you may see why I think this is important)
Respecting world opinion (Believe it or not, American politics affects everyone in the world, and it is wrong for government to act like it doesn't)
People from every country have the same value (the loss of an American or a Canadian is no worse than the loss of an Iraqi or a Sudanese person)
Pursuing moral high ground (Iraq? Rendition? Guantanimo? Not for me, thank you.)
Ever-increasing disparity is not a good thing.

Like I said, you already have your opinions. Whatever they are I hope you get to vote because I won't be able to. Don't take that for granted.

The Blue Raja Strikes Again!

2008-10-27T10:20:00.008-06:00

A couple days ago in our quiet and peaceful community, Janelle decided to go for a spin around Liberty Park, which is right by our house. As she arrived, however, she noticed that there was a lot of commotion going on the back side of our block (our backdoor neighbor). Police cars were starting to accumulate and officers were fanning out to surround an apartment building. Like any citizen in a situation where police have their guns drawn and are moving in on a target, she called me and a few other people to come see what was going on.

When we arrived, the police had an apartment surrounded with two or three flak-jacketed officers at each corner of his building with their guns at the ready. Some of the officers were shouting down to the target and seemed to be trying to convince him to surrender. Since we had been eschewed by another officer, we mostly watched from a distance and, after enduring several boring minutes of the standoff, we decided to go home -- about 25 yards from the action, as the bird flies.

Later that night we were checking the news and came across an article describing the incident. Turns out, he stabbed his wife with a fork. Yeah, I know. A fork.

I think she's okay.

Wedding and Engagement Pictures (finally online)

2008-10-04T13:09:00.004-06:00

So, after such a long wait, we finally do have access to the proofs from our wedding.

Our photographer just let us know yesterday that we can get our engagement pictures at 30% off until tomorrow night at midnight (So buy them fast if you are going to!). Our wedding pictures are 30% off until midnight on Sunday Oct 12th. There are some really great pictures of guests, details, friends, and family from our wedding events. Let me know what you think!

The New Olsens

2008-09-22T19:01:00.004-06:00

It seems almost pointless to mention that I have been really busy. It seems almost equally pointless to mention that I have had a hard time getting around to work on my blog (no internet access at the moment). I knew I would become busier being married, but I think I slightly underestimated how busy I'd become. All the same, it has been quite wonderful.

Today is my one month anniversary and I am at the library working. It's quite sad, isn't it? Janelle is at her aunt's house hearing about Ethiopia, so at least she gets to do something fun. For me, even being at the library working is kind of fun. Those who know me know I love libraries.

This was supposed to just be a quick note that our pictures from our super-great wedding are not quite online. Our photographer's noble actions require his full attention at the moment.

Well, I can't blog all day!

PS - Thanks to everyone who made it to our wedding/reception and thanks for all your generosity! I promise we're working on thank-you's.

Just Another Income Stream

2008-08-11T23:08:00.005-06:00

So, unless you're new to my blog, you have probably asked yourself after reading a post, "Why is Andrew's life so incredible and mine so humdrum?" I do not know the answer to this (nor to many other questions). but I do know that you are probably right to be jealous.

Feast your eyes on the contents of an email from earlier today. If you were me, this sort of thing would not even be exciting anymore because things like this are what make my life what it is. That is where my fortune came from in fact. My comments are in red. Behold:

Dear E-mail Owner (personalized introduction),

You are a winner of the UK National lottery online program that was held on the 9th August, 2008 (I won without even entering!). You have been approved to claim a sum £500,000.00 of (Five Hundred Thousand Great BritishPounds) (yes, "great britishpounds") of cash credited to file KTU/9023118308/03.To file for your claims you are to contact our claims agent (random extra spaces, missing spaces and grammatical errors):

Mr. Claire Kingston (gender-confused contact who has not stolen any prize money to buy her/himself a telephone)
Email: mrs.claire.kingston@gmail.com

Provide her with the following information to claim your prize. Full Name: Address: Phone Number: Country of residence: Sex: Age: Amount Won:

Yours faithfully,
Gibson Witterford (whose email is "maryanndaniels@adelphia.net")
Online Co-ordinator
U.K NATIONAL LOTTERY (an organisation I've never heard of from a country I've never been to)

So if anyone is in a financial bind, you know who to talk to. Don't worry... I've got your back.

Let the Games Begin!

2008-08-07T17:47:00.003-06:00

See, even in Microbiology we've caught Olympic fever.

Work was a little slow, so I started prepping a little for the upcoming Olympics. These are bacterial and fungal growth media in petri dishes. Since we already had them in so many colours, I figured that I may as well assemble them into the iconic Olympic rings (in order to bolster morale in the lab). So far so good.

I know, you're quite impressed, aren't you?

Great News!

2008-07-25T23:41:00.006-06:00

I got engaged!

Since that happened I have found it quite difficult to find the time to write posts. What happened!? I'm not sure.

It's been official for a few weeks now, and since then we have been trying to orchestrate a wedding in a fairly compressed time frame. It is not easy to plan a wedding. We have done a really good job though, and I am excited to see how everything ends up.

Unfortunately, there really is too much to sum up. Lots of planning going on. Maybe I'll get around to writing about it eventually, but maybe not.

Paragraphs on beetles on paragraphs on beetles

2008-06-26T18:11:00.007-06:00

Yes, you read that right.

The other night, I was working with Janelle on getting some stuff I'd written phrased correctly, so we were struggling to find all the right words, phrases, and structures. One of the paragraphs was about beetles and things I'd learned studying beetles.

Before we go any further, I should mention that my house is a clean house where the windows and doors all close rather firmly. Somewhat regular cleaning and tidying have prevented most pests from taking up residence. That said, let us continue.

As we read, I heard a muffled sound of tiny membranous wings beating near my head. Next thing I knew, a rather large beetle was sitting directly on the paragraph I had just written about beetles. It took only moments for me to recognize it as a Cerambycid, or long-horned beetle - one of the few types of beetle I can still pick out easily.

I took that to be a sign that whatever I was writing had gained the approval of the heavens. My only regret now is that I did not save the little guy for inclusion in the Monte L. Bean Museum of Natural History's Cerambicidae collection. Dr Clark would have been disappointed, I'm sure.

Newest Challenge

2008-06-25T22:21:00.004-06:00

Its been five years since I left Madagascar.
Five years since speaking French was required to survive.
Five long years of forgetting vocabulary and conjugations.

This is why I am so proud of myself and my latest endeavor: Reading the novel, Les Misérables. Granted, it's the condensed version, but it is the condensed French version, and that is the personal victory.

Interestingly enough, living with several franco-capable roommates since being a missionary never really did much to encourage my own pursuit of French. I think it made me too aware of how easily I found myself lost in French conversations, movies, setting, etc... So now, sans any close contact with friends who speak the language of love, I find myself setting out alone to retake my lingual skills.

The things that make the difference:
The pace - I can read slowly and think deeply about the words and their meaning.
The story - I've always loved the story and values portrayed in this novel.
The not needing to understand - I can be unfamiliar with any words I don't understand, and can usually still understand what is being said.

So there you have it: I'm not giving up on French (not yet anyways). Ask me again in 500 pages.

The Library

2008-06-21T17:20:00.004-06:00

I have said before, and I will say once more, how much I love the library. And not just the building I go to. I love the entire concept of libraries. Those Sumerians were really on to something good.

The City Library in Salt Lake has "Dedicated to serving the citizens of Salt Lake City" inscribed on the glass as you enter. I feel like when I walk into the library, everyone who is there suddenly becomes equals - all citizens (or TN Status Foreign Nationals on non-immigrant visas) and each one treated pretty much the same. So Mr. Homeless, Ms. Business, Mr. "Entrepreneurialship", and Miss Student are all there, shoulder to proverbial shoulder, putting to good use one of the greatest public goods the city has to offer.

Yes, I love the library.

Did you know...

2008-06-15T23:05:00.002-06:00

... that if you put a mouse in the cage with a boa constrictor that isn't hungry, the mouse can attack the snake and the snake won't defend itself. Trust me, it happened to someone I know. Well, to their snake I guess.

Dear Thief

2008-06-13T19:47:00.005-06:00

You stole my headphones and I know it.

I remember them being somewhere in the clutter in my room. And then you broke into my room. And you ransacked the entire place. And you found my headphones (you weren't interested in the iPod).

Then you tried them out (which explains why my Ipod wasn't where I left it). And you started cleaning up. And you must have spent hours on end cleaning because when I got back it looked the same as when I left. Exactly the same. Except for the iPod. You must be some sort of mastermind of genius to have executed the whole scheme so seamlessly.

Well thief, this is my oath to you: I will hunt you to the end of the earth if it takes my last dying breath. And with the energy from that breath, I will retake the earphones you stole.

Consider yourself warned.

Click on the horses

2008-06-13T07:26:00.002-06:00

I have no idea where I found this. It was ages ago.

iTunes' most dangerous feature

2008-06-03T23:09:00.005-06:00

Whatever you do, don't push Command+T on a mac when you are listening to iTunes. Sure it seems like a harmless thing to do. What could be so dangerous about turning on the visualization feature? It is so dangerous because it will hypnotize you. Just like it hypnotized me. I could stare at those unpredictable lines for hours. Just take my word and don't try it.

Taking back the streets

2008-05-31T23:58:00.009-06:00

Literally. We just got our street back.

It had been on loan to Disney for High School Musical 3 for several days and I was definitely ready for it to be over with. I did get to see Zack and Vanessa (I have not seen the movies, but these guys are apparently the stars) for about ten seconds, but mostly I just saw generators, crew, and semi trailers out our front door.

Even though it was pretty inconvenient and I was counting down for when they'd leave, I must admit that now I feel like I'm a little bit cooler for having been so close to the action.

Hair-pull-outingly busy

2008-05-26T22:20:00.004-06:00

I think that is how I'd describe it. I would love to post more, but sometimes it just doesn't fit in my schedule.

Today's topic is Thermostats.
If someone is hot, why would they turn a thermostat off instead of turning it right off? When I think of turning a furnace off instead of adjusting the heat, it makes me think of someone refusing to eat for a week because they are so full right now. The very thought makes my blood run cold. Oh wait, nope. That chill is just the cold air in my room. My mistake.

I was thinking how much I want a bluetooth thermostat. I would adjust it all the time via computer and program in amazing algorithms of eco-friendly temperatures. It would cool the home whilst I work, and keep it toasty when needed. Then, when I needed to change it because my schedule changes, some sort of consumer-friendly interface would let me readjust it all in mere moments. Programmable ones are too hard to remember what all the buttons do so all their usefulness goes unused. I searched online and couldn't find one though. I guess that is a product our children and our children's children will have to enjoy instead.

Playoff Hockey

2008-04-22T23:24:00.008-06:00

For most of the year I'm not much of a sports fan. That all goes out the window when the NHL goes into the playoffs. I'm not sure what happens but I think it has something to do with growing up as a kid in Calgary that just makes you love the Calgary Flames. I am transformed into a hopeless fan.

I haven't posted lately, partly because my free time has been swallowed up in following hockey. Tonight, unfortunately, Calgary got eliminated in the seventh game of their series against Stanley Cup favorites the San Jose Sharks. I guess that is good news for my blog.

Now begins my customary period of mourning (no pun intended). For a few days I will keep replaying the 8 minutes of poor playing that cost them the game. I will also smile as I think back to the great hit that Calgary's Sarich got on San Jose's Captain. This was in game three and gave the underdog Flames a chance of going on. See below for footage.

He didn't even get a penalty. I love these guys.

So, with my team's hockey season over, I begin the more productive phase of my summer, where I can get things done without a constant worry over how well my flames will do in their next matchup.

Go Flames Go!

A Spin on the Elliptical

2008-04-10T22:45:00.005-06:00

I tried a new machine on my last trip to the gym. They are really common, but I've always had a certain mistrust of elliptical machines. I mean no disrespect to the machines, nor to those who use them, but something just doesn't feel right about these new-fangled fitness devices.

I gave it ten minutes, and it wasn't bad as far as feeling the burn and all that, but I really didn't understand the "distance traveled" display.

When you are on a treadmill, the "distance traveled" simulates running on solid ground. When you are on the bikes, the "distance traveled" simulates riding a real bike on solid ground. When you're on an elliptical machine, what does the "distance traveled" even mean? The distance riding a unicycle? with moving handlebars?

I don't know, but my brief encounter with the machine only made me trust it less.

Multi-use machetes

2008-04-01T14:50:00.005-06:00

Yesterday I saw an old polynesian guy in the Smith's parking lot cleaning snow off his truck's windshield with a machete. Remind me to not cut that guy off in traffic.

Contacts

2008-03-26T06:50:00.007-06:00

For a while now I've been starting to wear contacts and, after some trial and error I think I've found a brand and type that are fairly comfortable. Almost too comfortable.

Last night as I was preparing for bed I popped out my left lens and put it in solution. Then I went to take out my right, but it felt like I was pulling on my cornea, not a contact lens. I stopped and thought about how painful pulling a cornea off might be.

Looking in a mirror I scoured my ocular cavity for any signs of silicone, but found none. My eye didn't feel totally normal (like how it usually does after the lens is out), but I wondered if that wasn't from pulling on my cornea. Frustrated I went to bed figuring that if it was still in there, I would feel it more in the morning.

I still felt it this morning and, as I poked around the edges of my eye, I cough sight of my contact lens, folded in eighths tucked deep in the outside corner of my eye. Does anyone have suggestions for keeping your contact lens from folding into eighths while you are wearing it?

And how did I not notice that?

Just one problem...

2008-03-24T22:13:00.003-06:00

I recently renewed my cell phone plan and got a new phone with it. The phone was practically free and is reasonably small, fast, and well designed with a single exception. The 'shutter' button on the side sticks out just enough that whenever anything bumps into it, it takes a picture. This was made especially apparent as I erased 11 pictures of the inside of my pocket from my phone earlier today. So, if there are any Samsung engineers reading this, the Samsung t439's button needs to be a little less sensitive, thanks.

Got Books?

2008-03-22T06:32:00.003-06:00

Okay, so this is mostly for people who
a) Have a fair number of books
and
b) Love organizing things.

I found (via NPR) a website that allows you to enter and catalogue all the books in your home library collection.

Just aim your browser on over to LibraryThing.org. I've found it highly interesting

BIrds

2008-03-15T19:39:00.005-06:00

I have a bird house and, hoping to bring birds to our yard, I bought a bag of bird seed.

My plan didn't work though because the wind blew the birdhouse against the tree and broke it, and then I think rodents found the bag of seeds, which is now full of holes. If those birds are getting any food from us, we're going to need a new plan.

Thumbs down for Margaret Dayton

2008-02-27T22:51:00.009-07:00

Every once in a while I am completely speechless after hearing what some politicians think. Sen. Margaret Dayton, R-Orem, said earlier this week, "I'm opposed to the anti-American philosophy that's somehow woven into all the [IB] classes as they promote the U.N. agenda."

I can't even say how many ways there are that I am offended by what she said. Does she know why the word "international" is in "International Baccalaureate"?
"Anti-American"?
"somehow woven"?
"UN Agenda"?
What? Xenophobic? Uninformed? Basically, I'm mad at her.

If anyone wants to hear me really rant, let me know. Otherwise, just know there's a lot more where this all came from.

Away Without Leave

2008-02-24T00:06:00.004-07:00

I have apparently lost my Driver's License and I've found it really surprising how vulnerable I feel without it. After some thought I'm pretty sure it was more than a week since I last saw it.

I don't know what I need to do to get a new one either. What do you need to do to prove that you are capable of driving? Do I need to do that multiple choice test again? I really hope not. That test is terrible.

Either way, I think I'll need to take some time off to go find it. The office seems to be open only when I'm supposed to be at the hospital working my little behind off.

People Can't Stop Changing

2008-02-22T22:10:00.002-07:00

Do you ever have times in your life where, over a period of only a few days or weeks you start feeling like a different person? It doesn't happen that often, but that is part of why I've found it hard to get on here and post. There's just too many changes to sum up, but in brief:

Life's good.
I'm happy.
I enjoy the hospital.
I feel like I have gained new perspective on my life.
I love my family.
I love Janelle.
I don't always understand my family.
Janelle took me to Monster Jam 2008

So, with that said, how can I complain?

Power on my keychain

2008-01-08T17:28:00.000-07:00

For a long time I felt bad at the grocery store when I would hand over my key chain. There, dingling and dangling beside my Smith's card was... my Albertson's card. The Smith's employees would all know that I was not a faithful customer. I was spending time with their enemy and arch competitor.

I felt like I was cheating on the store. They had placed confidence in me. We had gone so far as solemnizing our relationship through an exchange of personal information for a plastic card that gives me discounts. I, however, took advantage of their confidence by doing exactly the same thing over at the other store without telling them.

The cashier, with a hurt and confused look in her eye, might ask, "What is this?"

"But I thought we had something special!"

"How could you betray us?"

Normally I like it when people like me, so these thoughts, though subconscious, were troubling. Since recognizing their source, however, it has been a lot of fun. Now I'm in charge in the relationship. If you want to keep me as your customer you better make me happy while I'm here.

I am no longer ashamed by the two cards hanging off my key chain. They are symbolic that I'm not going to go shopping at any old store just because I have gone there before. If you don't have deals, I'll just go somewhere that does! My key chain is a symbol {cue music}, not of shame and distrust. No! It is a symbol of power, of freedom, and of the American Way!

The Holidays

2007-12-31T13:45:00.000-07:00

Hello again.

It has been a little while since I've blogged. With work and the holidays and traveling, I just got a little distracted. I hope you've been having as splendid a holidays as I did. I had a truly excellent Christmas this year and hope to have an equally magnificent New Years here in a few hours.

With this holiday season basically over (I get one more day before it is back to the daily grind), I am starting to think about what gifts I'll be giving next year. My little sister said that "[her] presence is sometimes the best present" {me rolling my eyes}. If she keeps up with comments like those, that is all she'll have next year.

I envy those people who manage to get their Christmas shopping done months in advance. It must take tremendous forethought and a very organized person to pull it off.

There is part of me that is captivated by order. Part of that must stem from my not feeling very orderly myself most of the time. Finances, my bedroom, my emails, my schedule, etc. I would be Happy if I managed to keep things more orderly. But I don't, so I'm learning to live with it.

Winter

2007-12-02T00:37:00.000-07:00

The first real snow of the year has fallen and it has reminded me how many things about winter I love. Snow is one of those things (even when I spend half my day shoveling it off the driveway). Snow, and especially when it's thick, makes everything just glow. Salt Lake's dark and lonely streets become so much brighter than they are for the rest of the year.

I remember this happening back home growing up: even in the dead of night it would still be so bright because the light reflected off all the snow, and up to the clouds and back to the ground... it would just hang out all night long making the world cheery and bright.

I also love Christmas candies and the associated goodies.
I love coming into a warm house.
I love wearing a coat that I know will keep me warm in almost any weather.
I love snow stuck on the branches of trees.
I love seasonal drinks and flavours of ice cream.
I love roads that are just a little slippery.
And I love other things, but basically I love winter.

Ratatouille

2007-11-16T06:49:00.001-07:00

Earlier this week I saw Ratatouille with Janelle. I really liked it. I wanted to write about it, but I insisted on my post including some sort of pun about putting the "oui" in Ratatouille. I couldn't get it to work. If you come up with a good context, please let me know.

A Fact You Never Knew

2007-11-11T22:35:00.001-07:00

Or at least I never knew: You can't mix snow tires and all-season tires.

The people at Costco almost did it but then they realized that it is illegal if they do... and probably punishable by forced labor. I mean, can you imagine the mayhem that would ensue?

Poison Toys

2007-11-08T23:15:00.001-07:00

Lately I've heard a few things about toys from China that are made with highly toxic chemicals in paints and plastics. This is a major problem. Kids all over the world are getting sick, and who can say what the long term effects of these sorts of problems will be?

The latest episode I've encountered involved a paint on children's toys with strong chemical similarities to "liquid ecstasy," a date rape drug. In all seriousness, this sounds extremely serious, and a problem that is this problematic needs to be addressed.

The news, however, needs much better examples to illustrate the danger. Allow me to quote the Guardian:

[The] boy's doctor, Matt Jaeger, added: "It was pretty dramatic. He was unconscious in this coma for about six hours. And then, over the course of just a few minutes, went from being completely asleep to wide awake and playing like nothing ever happened."

Especially worrisome is the fact that similar symptoms affect me almost every night from about 1130 pm until morning. I think my room needs to be inspected for cheap Chinese paints.

Eating Well

2007-11-07T22:54:00.002-07:00

Janelle chose some new recipes today and boy, oh, boy, were they tasty. We settled on seared salmon with minty/spicy/limey potatoes and watercress salad. We also enjoyed a raspberry-lime frosty dessert. You may perceive that words fail me. You are correct. It was... I will attempt to phrase it worthily... "delish-tacular".

Wish Me Luck

2007-11-07T22:48:00.002-07:00

Seinfeld was on to something

2007-11-05T18:53:00.001-07:00

Remember that bit Seinfeld did about over the counter drugs? Said he, "Extra Strength is the minimum strength we accept. Give me the maximum allowable dosage. Figure out how much will kill me, then back off a little. That's the kind of pain I'm in."

I've started trying to identify when I'm trying to "get more" simply for the sake of "getting more" and it has been fun to revolt against my normal routine. When I do my laundry, for instance, I no longer reflexively select "extra rinse" or "maximum extraction" and I add only the soap I need, not necessarily the amount recommended for deep blood stain removal. I no longer need my clothes to be "more dry" because my clothes feel just as happy (or even happier) when they are just "dry". In fact, "more dry" even takes longer, so why should I select it?

Well, I suppose my improvements are only laundry related, but I'm open to other changes if they cross my path or, if someone tells me to stop being ridiculous in other ways, I'll consider those too.

Earths

2007-11-04T22:06:00.001-07:00

According to ConsumerConsequences.com, it would take 6.1 planet Earths to accommodate all the people in our world, if everyone lived like me. That is kind of sad. I like to think that me and good ol' mother Earth are pals. I wouldn't do something to intentionally hurt her either. Apparently I have deluded myself into thinking I'm a fairly environmentally friendly guy. I'm sorry home planet... I'm so sorry.